Success is.........

                                                         How we define success


In this day in age success is usually defined by how much money you make, what kind of car you drive, what your house looks like and how well you live. These are the “human” determinations as I call them. I measure life a bit differently however. A man cannot be measure by what material value their live holds but what they've accomplished in life. I feel the best thing to gauge your successes are how well you can provide a stable loving environment for your children, if you can set and met all your education goals and how lastly how you feel about yourself as a person (do you value your own worth?)

My children as I've said before are everything to me. I live to make sure they are taken care of, that’s a challenge in itself. It’s hard being a single parent to four kids and one in the oven but it’s one I take with pride and very seriously. I remember how much my oldest daughter changed my perspective on life when she was born. The minute I laid eyes on her life just changed Now success in being a mom isn't how much stuff you can buy them, it’s about love and support and at times those things are challenging and they may not see it that way but I do the best I can. If I woke up and I felt like Billie Mcandless I don’t know how I could go on. I’m sure she felt like she gave Chris the best life possible but in the end he felt like he was missing something and perhaps he was but he never told them what that was. I hope I never have to feel that. I hope my parenting has told them they can talk to me or better yet if they can’t they have other people they can talk to who will support them if they need it. Nicholas Sparks said “What it's like to be a parent: It's one of the hardest things you'll ever do but in exchange it teaches you the meaning of unconditional love.” I believe through trials and tribulations and years of working at it my kids will be the best they can be. We have our daily struggles but we will work through them and strive for the best. Jon Krakauer said “According to the moral absolutism that characterizes McCandless's beliefs, a challenge in which a successful outcome is assured isn't a challenge at all.” Having kids doesn’t guarantee a certain outcome come it takes work and you have to be willing to whatever it takes.

Entering back into college has been a struggle. Some days I want to throw in the towel but I don’t. I know I’ve come this far and I can’t quit now. My most successful moment so far in college was completing the Medical Assistant program at Chabot and getting a job a day before we graduated. I hadn’t worked in 2 years and I felt so accomplished that last day of medical assisting. My teachers had prepared me to be the best CMA I could be and I was ready to prove it. With my certificate in hand I started working were I still work today I might add and set out to do a good job. I busted my ass and by doing that I turned what was supposed to be a temporary position into a permanent one. In that moment I felt like Alex when he said “You are wrong if you think Joy emanates only...from human relationships. God has placed it all around us...and all you have to do is reach for it.” My success at work isn’t about the paycheck (don’t get me wrong paycheck’s are nice) but rather how much I can help someone else. It makes me very happy when my patients are happy and that’s the greatest success story in medicine. Patients die and move on but making them happy is part of my job and if I can do that I’ve accomplished a lot. Albert Einstein said it best when he said “Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.” I appreciate my job and the people I encounter (most days) it make me a better person one of true value.


Successful people know and treasure their self-worth. People tend to take themselves for granted. I am one of them. When I was younger my dad wasn’t around that much. So when I got older I was destined to find someone to fill that void. I had a baby right out of high school and I felt that did the trick, but it wasn’t enough. I held onto my relationship with my ex longer than I probably should have and it played a trick on my confidence. When I didn’t feel like anyone loved me I just thought it was my fault. That feeling stemmed from a childhood not feeling like my dad wanted or appreciated me. I let people into my life who abused the fact that I had I need to be wanted and it wasn’t until I met my boyfriend that I changed. Chris said in into the wild “I'm going to paraphrase Thoreau here... rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness... give me truth. “ I needed someone to give me that truth and my love did that for me. He was very patience and kind. He endured a whole lot more than anyone should to love me and he never gave up. I’m grateful to him for that. Through he’s eyes I saw I was better than what I thought. I now know that I sold myself short in lots of instances just to please people. Today I value myself more than I ever have. I don’t take shit from pretty much anyone and that’s ok. Krakauer said “It’s not always necessary to be strong, but to feel strong.” I have moments when I don’t feel the strongest but I will not let that stop me. I’ve been to the bottom and the view is way better from the top!

My other passion

Another passion I have besides helping people is Music. when I'm down and out I can bust out my iPhone turn on iTunes and just get away. Growing up I was in choir so I respond to music. It soothes me and can change a bad day into a good one.
This song for good is about a relationship between two friends that may or may not be coming to an end. but what they found out is no matter what happens they're better off because they knew one another. On bad days I turn this song on and I feel free. Passion doesn't  always have to be what you can do for others, sometimes it can be something you do to help yourself. Music is my escape from the world if only just for a few minutes. I can get lost and a song and feel some of my problems melt away. When that happens I'm back in my happy place ready to carry on with the rest of my day.

Student stands up to lazy teacher @ Duncanville, TX High School

What would you do if you felt like you weren't learning in class. The answer most of us would sit and just do whatever the teacher said, but not this guy. He stood up for what he believed in so much that i feel its inspiring to others to do the same thing. Education in this country is a joke.Some kids lack basic skills when they graduate from high school. We should be asking ourselves why is that? We often wonder whats wrong with our youth but the answer is again quite simple we fail to prepare them. I'm glad this young man stood up to his teacher. It was a brave move but one he felt was necessary to address. I'm hopeful one day especially in California that we do a better service to our children and REALLY prepare them for the world through education.

 Roses in the concrete

People have been saying for years all it takes is a committed teacher to teach our youth. Jeff Duncan Andrade embodies committed. When lots of teachers were fleeing the Oakland public schools he was busy embracing it and the kids needed him. I’m amazed at this man’s dedication to education when so many others are out to collect a check. Studies have often shown students can thrive if they are introduced to a program and have someone to mentor them. I’m encouraged by this man and his dedication to his students. I wish for my children to have a dedicated teacher like him when they get to high school. William Arthur Ward said “The mediocre teacher tells. The good teacher explains. The superior teacher demonstrates. The great teacher inspires.” Our youth today need inspiration and encouragement to grow out of the concrete. It has been done others need to just follow his lead

Questions:

1    What is being done to counsel the kids who see all the violence in their community?

       How could parents help to enrich the lives of the urban youth?

    Why is Piedmont exempt from all the violence in Oakland ?

Chris Mcandless aka Alexander Supertramp had a passion for adventure. He set out right after graduating from college on the open road to view what the real America was like first hand. He was very reckless in his attempt living with no money, food or shelter but he didn't have a care in the world he was exploring the world and he like it that way. I’m sure people would say carefree exploration wasn't passion it was carelessness the same carelessness that got him killed in the first place, but I’d argue that you can’t tell one person what he can or cannot be passionate about. That is up to the individual. Eleanor Roosevelt said “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” Just as I feel my passion is to help people Chris’s was to explore and live and love every minute of it. It may have been the best decision in the long run but it was his and he was committed to it that’s saying something.

We had a class discussion about the privileged individual and passion. Chris came from a family of privilege but he didn't let that affect him. From the time he was little he would find ways to work hard and earn his keep. Many children who are born to privilege think life should be handed to them but in Chris’s case it was the opposite. If anything Billie and Walt taught him that stuck it was hard work and the value of hard work. Chris prided himself on that and was very passionate about his abilities to work hard and anything that came his way no matter the task. This stereotype of passion and privilege doesn't always connect just as all people who face poverty may or may not have a passion for anything. Life, our circumstances and surroundings shapes and molds are passion not the amount of money we have or where we live etc.


Chris was a smart kid. He went to prestige’s schools and did well. Never the less this wasn’t the driving force of his passion. Once he discovered the truth about his parents his real passion was to escape the oppression he felt he was under. He still obeyed what they told him to do until he was done with college but after that he felt he was free to live his life the way he wanted. I think Chris being a smart educated kid made him confident he could conquer his conquest. This may have made him seem arrogant to some but to me his education helped fuel his passion. He almost made it out when he found what he was looking for in the wild and I think on the day he went to cross the river if the tide hadn't been so high or he would have found another way around he would be alive to tell his own story. Passion drives us all to many different outcomes in life and I thing that were the book and the passion project etc intersect.

My obstacles in college and how i'm overcoming them

After I had my youngest son I knew something had to give in my life. Working retail forever was a no end kind of life for me. With that being said I decided I wanted to go back , no in fact I decided I had to go back to school. The 2 biggest obstacles to that were losing time to spend with my kids and the lack of time I’d have period. The two ways that helped were having a support system and knowing I had to do it and failure wasn't an option.

So many people will tell you family comes first and really it does. Without my kids who knows where I’d be. I became a mom at an early age and when my daughter was about 6 or 8 months I took one Spanish class at Chabot to see if I could do it. It wasn't the easiest task but I did it. The next fall I enrolled in 2 classes and at first everything was fine but then my ex husband decided to be less than helpful and I had to withdrawal from my classes. Now I’m sure you’re wondering well why is this relevant to why I stay in school now? That’s simple it reminds me that I can’t let people stop me from reaching my goals. OK so fast forward about 8-9 years and I’m back in college. I have more kids now but my asshole ex husband is out of the picture and I’m more motivated than ever to finish school to prove to my kids that if I can do it with a full time job and a family anyone can.

My second biggest hurdle is time. I have four kids and a job and that right there is time consuming, than add 2 school nights a week, homework and studying and all your time is now gone. I always feel like time is working against me but I can’t stop now I’m too close to the finish line. Oprah Winfrey says “You can have it all. Just not all at once.”  We can have our dreams come true we just have to be patience, work hard and wait. Time doesn't stop but I've learned maximizing your time well help get you where you need to go. Obstacles are always going to be wherever you look the key is finding solutions to help you.

I have the best support system any single parent can have. Without them I wouldn't be able to go to school at all. This indeed may not be necessary for a young single person but it’s a must for a single parent like me. When I went back to school in 2009 to become a medical assistant at Chabot I had the full support and backing of my family. They easily could have not helped me with this but that’s not the case. When I’m at school they watch my kids make sure my kids do their homework and take care of anything they need till I get home. I owe a debt of gratitude to them every day. Kobe Bryant said “my parents are my backbone. Still are. They're the only group that will support you if you score zero or you score 40” My family is the same way and I’m very thankful they've supported my dream.

The second way I get is by not giving up. What kind of message would I be sending to my children if I threw in the towel when times get rough? I’d be telling them it was OK to quit. This isn't the message I will convey to them. I have to keep pushing no matter what. The old saying goes a winner never quits and its true they don’t so I refuse to quit I have to win. Getting my AA is in my sights I have to just stay focused. Trials will come but I know I have people counting on me so I always have that in the back of my mind. Teddy Roosevelt said “I believe you can and you're already there” I’m there  and I’m not leaving I will finish college and make everyone proud

Passions and Poverty

                              What’s the connection between passion and poverty?

Some people would argue that when you have nothing you have more passion than people who are well off. Others would argue people who live on or below the poverty line don’t have time for passion because they’re too busy concerned with the everyday struggle and lack of time doesn't permit passion. I think it’s a combination of both things. What is passion? It could be a desire to help people, it could be passion for music or nature or what have you, passion varies from person to person.

My passion is helping people. Ever since I was little I wanted to be two things number one a princess and number two a teacher. I guess princesses don’t help people but teachers sure do. My drive has always been to do what I could for people no matter the cost. I’m not a teacher obviously but I help people in others ways. I don’t know what poverty looks like from firsthand experience but I do know what not having time for passion means. Keeping my passions alive is a constant struggle one I have to keep in mind when the time escapes me. Martha Graham said “Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. Great dancers are great because of their passion.” We are great because of our passion no matter what they are.

Everyone has passion. It just differs from person to person. Mine is helping people yours could be as simple as living for the moment and cherishing it. It’s as simple as that really. As long as something moves you even if you’re not quite sure what it is. I’m sure people who face poverty have a passion to survive and that’s good enough for me. The struggle is real and it affects people every day. Fredrick Douglass said “if there is no struggle, there is no progress.” That quote is a prime example of passion. Many people fight through the day just to make it and that’s what real today.

Passion Project My view

Passion is something most of us lose along the way. Life usually gets in the way and the passion in turn dies. That's normal in my point of view. My passion is to help people. I've always felt a need to go out of my way for the people I care about. This has not always work to my benefit but I refuse to give up. My passion for helping people has lead me back to school to pursue nursing. The passion project makes sense to anyone who has lost their passion along the way. It may renew your desire to change direction in life or just make you see your doing all the right things! I think the community of high school graduates planing on entering community college should have to watch the passion project. Its hard leaving high school and transitioning to college, its uncharted territory. They should know that its OK not to know what major their going to pursue etc. Instead a lot of them come to Chabot in a panic and drop out because they had no support.. This video tells you its OK to make mistakes in those mistake you may find you passion, and it may be one you weren't expecting at all